Well, we (Heather, Christy, Brandon, Ia, and I) are all hanging out in the computer room in the house, just sitting around, talking, typing, surfing and playing. I’m talking to Keri on ICQ, well, I was… just a calm night. We watched PCU on DVD (yeah, that’s right, DVD!), ate pizza, and are just hanging out. It’s a mellow night all around.
Tag: friends
It’s time for Uncle Kacey to be in the lab again. That means I have a bit of free time to sit and spew nonsense into my journal. Okay, to me it’s not nonsense really, I’ll know what it was all about when I go back and look at it. I’m sure I’ll appreciate every page of this when I’m old and mindless, when I can’t remember what I did with my life. I can look back and see that I did abso-fucking-lultely nothing.
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A Grain of Salt
I was very upset last night, and while a lot of my thoughts and feelings are not necessarily mis-represented, they are not stated with any tact or sugar coating. I was really tense and pissed off, I have no excuse for my harshness and bluntness. I meant a lot of it, and in fact I meant most of it. I just want to say that I never set out to hurt or offend anyone with my entry, I just needed to shout, out loud or on a keyboard, either would work. I chose livejournal because I want to open myself up to my friends and the world to see. I want to show people that everyone has problems and can get angry, or upset, or irrational, or giddy, or horny, or what have you and it’s not wrong, it’s not bad, you’re not fucked up, you’re just human. People have been like this for 1000 years and no series of psychoactive drugs is going to change that. Every generation tries to fix the things that make us human.
As for Fancy turning people on me, that’s not true, I mis-spoke. I realized that shortly after I wrote it and I didn’t mean it that way. I never did, nor did I ever really think that. I was angry, and as I said, I meant most of what I said, but I also spoke irrationally. That was a statement falsely written out of anger and paranoia. I did not mean it, nor do I believe it.
This too shall pass and we will grow and learn from it. We may not grow together nor change what has happened, but we will all be wiser as a result. That I do believe.
FUCKING BITCH WHORE CUNT BAG CUM BUCKET! (edited after thought and contemplation 09/07/2003 7:52 PM)
You know, she’s like a fucking cat stuck in a 70 foot tree! No, not Heather. Someone else. She’s on my friend’s list but I’m not saying who, if you figure it out, it’s kudos to you. Anyway, back to my analogy.
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Thursday in the Lab
Well, I’m in the lab again. I don’t get to watch the end of Dude, Where’s My Car? I mean it’s my DVD so I can watch it whenever I want, but it’s not the same watching 2/3 of a movie and then having to walk away. You’re in the story, you’re involved. Oh well, it’s my job to manage the lab and make sure it is operational, if that means walking out on a movie to man the front desk, so be it.
I’ve started searching for other Dentonintes, and if they interest me, adding them to my Friends list. Can’t say if they’re going to stay there, I may get so sick of seeing strangers post on my Friend’s page that I delete them all. I’m just in a wierd mood right now and want to feel like a lot of people are interested in me, and since I can’t get on other people’s friends lists, I thought I’d go ahead and put people on mine.
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It’s been a couple days…
Things are going a bit better, but then they always do after crazy monkey sex. I think I have an optomism cycle I go through. When Heather and I are able to actually get things in sync, I’m usually good for a week or so, I’ll make comments and try to create opportunities, but I’m not overly put off by rejection. After a week or so, I start to feel like rejection is the status quo and I start to feel desperate and dejected. If it goes on for more than two weeks, then I start to feel nihilistic and that things are going to only get worse. If we make it past three weeks, we usually get in a big explosive fight which, while we do not have make-up sex, per-se, we usually seem to temporarilly resolve our issues in the next day or so. And then we start all over again. Maybe this is the cycle of our lives and I just need to learn to accept it.
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Look how Damn Early it is!
Well, my job has decided that I need to be at work much earlier than I used to be. I have to actually be at work between 7:30 and 7:45 every morning. What’s more is that I have to sit in the lab for those first 15-30 minutes just in case someone (faculty) needs access before their class. Oh well, maybe I’ll actually start doing a daily thought in LiveJournal as a result.
Well, I had a vaguely productive weekend. I played HERO on Friday. I think the game is going great, I’m afraid that 
Derek may be disheartened by it though. Our characters are supposed to be very mundane in the modern world and then strange, supernatural things start happening. As role players, this is often a tough concept to play, to not take these things that are typical to RPGs in stride and end up being too cool for school. I think so far the three players are playing freaked out and confused very realistically. Derek seems a bit thrown off by some of our reactions, but I think he’s enjoying it. Though there were about 10 minutes on friday that he just covered his eyes and shook his head (Mike has that effect on people though).